What Should You Do With a Parent's House When They Move to Assisted Living?

By Kerry Sholtes, REALTOR® and Senior Transition Specialist 

When a parent decides to move into assisted living, one of the next questions families often face is:

What should we do with the house?

Should you sell it right away?

Keep it for a while?

Rent it?

Wait until your parent is completely settled?

Should you renovate before putting it on the market?

And who is going to deal with everything still inside?

For many Westmoreland County families, the longtime family home is one of their parent's largest financial assets. It is also often one of their most emotional assets.

That is why I don't believe the first conversation should automatically be, "Let's get the house listed."

The first step is understanding your parent's situation, timeline, finances, wishes, and the condition of the property. From there, you can determine what makes the most sense for both your parent and your family.

Here is what I encourage families to consider.

First, Understand the Entire Transition Timeline

Before deciding what to do with the home, determine what is happening with the move itself.

Ask questions such as:

• Has an assisted living community already been selected?
• Is there an available apartment or room?
• Is there a waitlist?
• When will your parent actually move?
• Will they need furniture from the current home?
• How much downsizing will be necessary?
• Will the proceeds from the home eventually be needed?
• Does the family have time to prepare the property?
• Will anyone be available locally to maintain the home after the move?

These answers can completely change the real estate strategy.

A family whose parent is moving next week has a very different situation from a family whose parent expects to move six months from now.

This is why senior transition real estate requires more than simply determining a list price.

The home sale needs to work with the transition, not against it.

Option 1: Sell the House Before the Move

For some families, selling before the move makes sense.

Perhaps the senior has already found their next residence and there is enough time to prepare the home before the transition.

Selling first can also provide certainty.

The family knows what the home sold for, how much equity is available, and one major responsibility has already been completed.

However, there is an important emotional consideration.

Selling a longtime home before a senior has fully transitioned into their new residence can make the process feel rushed.

Your parent may still need furniture, clothing, medical equipment, important paperwork, family photographs, or sentimental belongings.

Trying to simultaneously sort a lifetime of possessions, prepare a home for sale, choose what will move, and adjust emotionally to assisted living can become overwhelming.

If the timeline allows, build in enough time so your parent does not feel that everything is happening at once.

Option 2: Move First and Sell the House Afterward

For many families, this can be a more comfortable approach.

Your parent moves into their new residence first.

They bring the furniture, clothing, photographs, keepsakes, and other items that matter most.

Then the family can return to the home and address what remains.

This approach can make downsizing easier because you know exactly what fits in the new living space.

It can also provide emotional breathing room.

Instead of asking your parent to make hundreds of decisions before moving, you can focus first on helping them become comfortable in their new home.

Once the move is complete, attention can shift to the property.

The disadvantage is that the family temporarily becomes responsible for two residences.

Even when no one is living in the house, it still needs attention.

There may be utilities, insurance, property taxes, lawn care, snow removal, repairs, cleaning, and routine checks on the property.

That is why I encourage families to create a timeline rather than simply saying:

"We'll deal with the house later."

Later can quickly turn into months.

Option 3: Keep the House

Sometimes families are not ready to sell.

That may be completely reasonable.

Perhaps your parent wants reassurance that the assisted living move is going to work.

Maybe another family member is living in the property.

Perhaps the family simply needs time before making a permanent decision.

Keeping the house temporarily can provide flexibility.

But make sure everyone understands what that decision involves.

Consider:

• Who will maintain the property?
• Who will pay the expenses?
• Who will check on the home regularly?
• What happens during winter?
• Is the insurance company aware that the home may be vacant?
• How long does the family realistically plan to keep it?
• What event will trigger a decision to sell?

I like families to establish a specific point when they will revisit the decision.

For example:

"Mom will move in October. We will give her until January to settle in, and then we will make a final decision about the house."

That provides flexibility without allowing the property to remain in limbo indefinitely.

Option 4: Rent the House

Families sometimes ask whether renting the home is better than selling.

It can be an option, but becoming a landlord should be a deliberate financial decision.

Consider the property itself.

Does it need repairs before someone could rent it?

Who will manage the property?

Who will handle maintenance calls?

What happens if the tenant stops paying?

How much rent would the home realistically generate?

What will insurance cost?

What expenses will continue?

Would your parent or the person legally responsible for their finances want the responsibility of owning a rental property?

There may also be financial, tax, estate-planning, and long-term-care considerations that should be discussed with the appropriate attorney, accountant, or financial professional.

A home should not automatically become a rental simply because the family feels uncomfortable selling it.

Compare the realistic rental scenario with what selling would accomplish.

Find Out What the House Is Actually Worth

Before choosing between keeping, renting, or selling, get an accurate assessment of the home's current market value.

Online estimates can be a starting point, but longtime family homes often have characteristics automated estimates cannot fully evaluate.

Condition matters.

Updates matter.

Deferred maintenance matters.

Lot size matters.

Layout matters.

Location within the neighborhood matters.

Current buyer demand matters.

A home that has not been sold for 30 or 40 years may also have few directly comparable recent sales.

For a family navigating a senior transition, understanding value is not simply about choosing a listing price.

It helps answer larger questions.

Would selling provide resources that could support your parent's next stage of life?

Would investing money in renovations produce enough additional value to justify the expense?

Would renting provide a reasonable return compared with selling?

Can the family afford to carry the property for another six months?

You can make better decisions once you have real numbers.

Don't Assume the Entire House Needs Renovated

This is one of the biggest areas where I see families become overwhelmed.

A parent may have lived in the same house for several decades.

The kitchen may be dated.

The carpet may be old.

Wallpaper may still be on the walls.

Bathrooms may not look like something you would see in a new construction home.

Adult children walk through and start making a list.

New kitchen.

New flooring.

Fresh paint everywhere.

Bathroom renovation.

New fixtures.

Landscaping.

Suddenly, the family thinks they need to spend tens of thousands of dollars before they can sell.

That may not be the best strategy.

Before doing major renovations, understand three things:

What is the home worth today?

What would it likely be worth after improvements?

How much would those improvements actually cost?

Sometimes strategic improvements make sense.

Sometimes buyers would rather purchase the home at an appropriate price and make their own updates.

Sometimes the best return comes from cleaning, decluttering, addressing deferred maintenance, improving curb appeal, and presenting the home well.

A good senior transition real estate plan should protect the family's resources, not automatically create a renovation project.

What Do You Do With Decades of Belongings?

For many families, the house itself is easier than everything inside it.

A longtime home can contain decades of:

Furniture.

Family photographs.

Holiday decorations.

Clothing.

Tools.

Dishes.

Collectibles.

Important documents.

Children's belongings.

Items stored for grandchildren.

And boxes no one has opened in 20 years.

Do not try to tackle everything at once.

I recommend beginning with five basic categories:

Moving With Your Parent

Start with the new residence.

Measure the rooms and understand what furniture will realistically fit.

Then identify the belongings your parent needs and wants most.

Staying in the Family

Ask children, grandchildren, and other family members what they genuinely want.

Give everyone a reasonable deadline to decide.

Selling

Furniture, antiques, collectibles, tools, and other belongings may have value.

Depending on the amount, an estate sale or auction may be appropriate.

Donating

Usable furniture, clothing, household items, and other belongings may be useful to local organizations.

Removing

Eventually there will probably be items that need to be discarded.

That is where junk removal or a dumpster may become useful.

The process can be emotional.

Give your parent a voice whenever possible.

You are not simply emptying a property.

You are sorting through someone's life.

What If the Adult Children Live Out of Town?

This is extremely common.

Mom or Dad may live in Greensburg, Irwin, North Huntingdon, Latrobe, Murrysville, Jeannette, or another Westmoreland County community, while their children live in another state.

Suddenly an adult child is trying to coordinate:

The assisted living community.

Healthcare appointments.

Movers.

Furniture.

Donations.

Repairs.

Junk removal.

Cleaning.

Contractors.

Real estate.

And family decisions from several hours away.

That is where having trusted local professionals becomes especially important.

A real estate professional specializing in senior transitions should be able to help manage the property side of the process and connect the family with additional resources when needed.

You should not have to make a six-hour drive every time someone needs to meet a contractor at the house.

What If Your Parent Is on an Assisted Living Waitlist?

Do not assume nothing can happen until a room becomes available.

A waitlist can actually provide planning time.

You may be able to begin:

• Sorting belongings
• Identifying what will move
• Gathering financial and property information
• Getting a home-value assessment
• Interviewing service providers
• Addressing necessary maintenance
• Developing a home-sale strategy

The goal is not necessarily to list the house immediately.

The goal is to avoid starting from zero when the call finally comes that space is available.

For families dealing with a senior living waitlist, planning ahead can turn an urgent move into a much more manageable transition.

Who Has the Authority to Make Decisions About the Home?

Before listing or making significant decisions involving the property, make sure the family understands who has legal authority to act.

If your parent owns the home and is able to make their own decisions, the decision remains theirs.

If another person is acting under a power of attorney, trust, estate, guardianship, or another legal arrangement, additional requirements may apply.

This is not an area where families should guess.

Talk with an appropriate Pennsylvania attorney or other qualified professional about your family's specific situation.

Your Realtor can help with the real estate transaction, but legal authority and estate-planning questions should be handled by the appropriate legal professional.

Remember That This Is Your Parent's Home

It is very easy for a house to become a project.

There are contractors to call.

Boxes to pack.

Forms to sign.

Furniture to move.

Deadlines to meet.

But for your parent, this may be the place where they raised their children.

It may be where grandchildren spent Christmas morning.

It may be where they celebrated anniversaries, birthdays, graduations, and ordinary Tuesday dinners.

Even when someone knows assisted living is the right decision, leaving can still feel like a loss.

Give that emotion room.

Take photographs.

Save meaningful items.

Let your parent tell stories.

Ask which belongings matter most.

Include them in decisions whenever possible.

Efficiency matters, but dignity matters more.

How Kerry Helps Westmoreland County Families Navigate the House

My role as a REALTOR® and Certified Seniors Professional specializing in senior transitions is not simply to arrive when a family is ready to put a sign in the yard.

I prefer to become involved earlier.

That allows us to look at the entire situation and develop a plan around your family's needs.

I can help you:

• Understand the home's current market value
• Evaluate whether repairs or improvements make financial sense
• Develop a realistic timeline
• Think through the order of the move and sale
• Coordinate property-related service providers
• Prepare the home for market
• Develop the pricing and marketing strategy
• Manage the real estate transaction
• Communicate with family members who may live out of town

Sometimes our first conversation results in a listing.

Sometimes it results in a plan for six months from now.

And sometimes I tell a family they are not ready to sell yet.

That is okay.

The goal is not simply to sell the house.

The goal is to help your family make the right decision at the right time.

You Don't Have to Figure Out the House Before Asking for Help

If your parent is preparing to move into assisted living, you may feel like you need to have everything figured out before contacting a Realtor.

You don't.

You don't need to know when the house should be listed.

You don't need to have everything cleaned out.

You don't need to renovate first.

You don't even need to have made the final decision to sell.

A good first conversation can simply be:

"Here is what is happening with Mom. What should we be thinking about with the house?"

From there, we can develop a plan.

If your family is navigating an assisted living move, downsizing, or another senior transition in Westmoreland County, I am happy to help you understand your options and determine what should happen next.

Kerry Sholtes, REALTOR®
REALTOR® and Senior Transition Specialist 
Melissa Merriman Team, Always Home Group
724-858-8108  724-861-0500
Kerry@MelissaMerriman.com

Frequently Asked Questions

Should we sell Mom's house before she moves to assisted living?

Not necessarily. Some families sell before the move, while others find it easier to move their parent first and address the house afterward. The best timing depends on the assisted living move date, finances, condition of the property, family logistics, and your parent's comfort level.

How soon after a parent moves to assisted living should we sell the house?

There is no required timeline that fits every family. However, if the home will remain vacant, establish a plan for maintenance and determine when the family will revisit the decision rather than leaving the property indefinitely.

Should we renovate an older parent's house before selling?

Not automatically. Have the home evaluated before beginning expensive renovations. Some improvements may increase marketability or value, while others may cost more than the family is likely to recover.

Can we sell a parent's home if they are already in assisted living?

Moving to assisted living does not by itself determine who has authority to sell a property. Ownership and legal authority matter. Families with questions involving powers of attorney, trusts, guardianship, or estate issues should consult an appropriate Pennsylvania legal professional.

What if Mom's house is full of belongings?

Start with the items she needs for the new residence, followed by belongings family members want to keep. Remaining items can then be separated for sale, donation, or removal. You do not need to empty the entire house in one weekend.

Can Kerry help before we are ready to list the house?

Yes. Involving me earlier allows us to evaluate the property, discuss timing, identify potential home-preparation needs, and create a plan that works with your parent's transition rather than waiting until everything becomes urgent.