What Should We Do With Mom or Dad’s House When They Move Into Assisted Living?

By Kerry Sholtes | Senior Transition Specialist | Melissa Merriman Team

When a parent moves into assisted living or another senior living community, families suddenly find themselves facing a long list of decisions.

What furniture should go with them?

What happens to everything left in the house?

Who is handling the bills?

Does the home need repairs?

And eventually, one of the biggest questions comes up:

What should we do with the house?

For families throughout Westmoreland County and Western Pennsylvania, this isn't always an easy question to answer.

A longtime family home isn't just another piece of real estate. It may be the house where you grew up, where holidays were celebrated and where your parents spent 30, 40 or even 50 years of their lives.

At the same time, keeping a vacant house costs money and requires ongoing attention.

So how do you decide whether to keep it, rent it or sell it?

Here is what I want families to know.

You don't necessarily have to make every decision immediately, but you should understand your options and the financial implications of waiting.

First, Make Sure You Know Who Can Make Decisions About the Home

Before discussing price, repairs or putting the house on the market, determine who legally has the authority to make decisions regarding the property.

If your parent is able to make their own financial and real estate decisions, the process may be relatively straightforward.

If someone else is acting on their behalf, additional documentation may be necessary.

Depending on the circumstances, this could involve a power of attorney, trust, guardianship, estate or other legal arrangement.

This is an area where families should consult with the appropriate attorney or other qualified professional. Your Realtor can help coordinate the real estate transaction, but shouldn't be the person interpreting legal documents or providing legal advice.

Getting this question answered early can prevent significant delays later.

Option 1: Keep the House

Sometimes keeping the home makes sense.

Perhaps your parent is trying assisted living temporarily and hasn't decided whether the move will be permanent.

Maybe another family member plans to live there.

Or perhaps the family simply isn't emotionally ready to sell.

There is nothing inherently wrong with waiting.

However, it's important to understand what keeping the house actually involves.

Even if there is no mortgage, there may still be expenses for:

• Property taxes
• Homeowners insurance
• Utilities
• Lawn care
• Snow removal
• Repairs and maintenance
• HOA fees, if applicable
• Security or monitoring
• Periodic cleaning

A vacant home also needs someone checking on it regularly.

This becomes particularly important during a Western Pennsylvania winter. Frozen pipes, roof issues, storm damage or heating problems can become expensive quickly if nobody is regularly visiting the property.

You should also contact the insurance provider to discuss the home's occupancy status. Insurance requirements can change when a property is vacant for an extended period.

Keeping the home may absolutely be the right choice, but it should be an intentional decision rather than something that happens simply because nobody knows what else to do.

Option 2: Rent the House

Families sometimes ask whether renting Mom or Dad's house would be better than selling it.

It can be.

A rental property can potentially produce income while allowing the family to retain ownership of the real estate.

But becoming a landlord also creates responsibilities.

Before deciding to rent, consider questions such as:

• Is the home ready to be rented?
• Are repairs or updates necessary?
• Who will screen tenants?
• Who will collect rent?
• Who will respond when something breaks?
• Who will handle maintenance?
• What happens if the tenant stops paying?
• Does the family actually want to manage a rental property?

Hiring a professional property manager can reduce the workload, but that expense should be included when evaluating the financial side of the decision.

You should also discuss potential tax, estate and financial-planning implications with the appropriate professionals before converting a longtime residence into a rental property.

The important question isn't simply:

"Could we rent it?"

It's:

"Does owning this property as a rental fit our family's financial goals and responsibilities?"

Option 3: Sell the House

For many families, selling eventually becomes the most practical option.

The proceeds may be needed to help fund senior living expenses.

The family may not want the responsibility of maintaining a vacant property.

Or your parent may simply be ready to close that chapter.

If selling is the likely outcome, one of the first things I recommend is having a Realtor evaluate the property before you begin making repairs or emptying the entire house.

That may sound backward, but it can save families considerable time and money.

Don't Assume the House Needs to Be Completely Updated

This is one of the biggest misconceptions I encounter.

Adult children walk into a parent's longtime home and immediately notice everything that looks dated.

The kitchen hasn't been remodeled since 1989.

There's wallpaper in the dining room.

The carpet is old.

The bathroom isn't modern.

Their first reaction is often:

"We have to redo all of this before we can sell."

Not necessarily.

Some improvements may help a home sell more successfully.

Others may cost more than they're worth.

The answer depends on the home's condition, location, likely buyer, current competition and your family's priorities.

For example, there is a significant difference between addressing an active water leak and replacing a perfectly functional kitchen simply because the cabinets aren't today's most popular style.

Before spending thousands of dollars, determine which improvements are likely to matter to buyers.

Consider Your Family's Three Biggest Resources

When I'm helping a family determine how to prepare a parent's home for sale, I like to think about three things:

Time. Money. Energy.

Every family has a different amount of each.

If you have more time than money

You may choose to sort belongings gradually, handle some cosmetic projects yourself and prepare the property over several months.

If you have money but very little time

It may make sense to hire professionals for cleanout, estate sales, painting, repairs, landscaping or other services.

If you have very little time or energy

Selling the property closer to its current condition may be the right strategy.

There isn't one correct answer.

The best plan is the one that balances the potential financial return with what your family can realistically manage.

What About Everything Inside the House?

For many families, this is harder than selling the house itself.

A longtime home can contain decades of belongings.

Furniture.

Photographs.

Holiday decorations.

Tools.

China.

Clothing.

Important paperwork.

Boxes that haven't been opened in 20 years.

Trying to deal with all of it during a major family transition can feel impossible.

Start by identifying the items your parent wants in their new residence.

Then identify anything family members want to keep.

From there, remaining belongings can generally be divided into categories for selling, donating, recycling or discarding.

Depending on the amount involved, professional senior move managers, organizers, estate sale companies, auction companies or cleanout services can be extremely helpful.

Most importantly, don't assume your family has to personally handle every box in the house.

Should We Sell Before or After the Move to Assisted Living?

There isn't a universal answer.

In some situations, preparing the home for sale before the move makes sense.

In others, moving your parent first can significantly reduce stress.

If the transition is happening because of an immediate health or safety concern, the priority may simply be getting your loved one settled into the appropriate living environment.

The real estate can be addressed afterward.

If you have more flexibility, coordinating the move and home sale together may reduce the amount of time the family is paying expenses for both properties.

This is why I encourage families to begin discussing the real estate piece before a crisis forces a decision, whenever possible.

Even if you aren't ready to sell, understanding the home's approximate market value and what would be involved in preparing it can make future decisions easier.

How Much Is Mom or Dad's House Worth?

Online home estimates can provide a starting point, but longtime homes can be particularly difficult to value automatically.

Two houses on the same street may have very different values depending on their condition, improvements, lot, layout and maintenance history.

A home that hasn't been updated in decades may still have significant value.

Conversely, spending $50,000 updating a home doesn't automatically increase its market value by $50,000.

A local market analysis should look at the property itself, recent comparable sales and the homes buyers would be comparing it against today.

That information can also help your family evaluate the difference between selling as-is and making selected improvements before listing.

Don't Forget About the Cost of Waiting

Families sometimes leave a parent's house sitting vacant because making a decision feels overwhelming.

A month becomes three months.

Three months becomes six.

Meanwhile, the family continues paying taxes, insurance, utilities and maintenance.

This doesn't mean you should rush to sell.

It means the decision to wait should be made with actual numbers.

Calculate approximately what it costs each month to maintain the property.

Then compare that with the potential benefits of keeping it.

Once you see those numbers, the decision often becomes clearer.

This Decision Isn't Only About Money

There is another part of this conversation that shouldn't be overlooked.

Selling a parent's home can be emotional.

For an adult child, this may be the house you still think of as "home."

For your parent, selling it may represent a significant loss of independence.

That deserves patience.

Before becoming a Realtor, I spent more than 20 years working in healthcare. That experience shaped the way I approach senior transitions today.

Families navigating these moves aren't simply making real estate decisions.

They're often simultaneously dealing with healthcare, finances, caregiving responsibilities, changing family roles and difficult emotions.

My job isn't to pressure a family into selling a house.

It's to help you understand the real estate options so you can make an informed decision about what makes sense for your family.

Start With a Conversation, Not a Listing Appointment

If your parent is moving into assisted living, independent living, memory care or another senior community in Westmoreland County, you don't need to have the house cleaned out before contacting me.

You don't need to know whether you're definitely selling.

And you certainly don't need to start renovating first.

We can begin with a conversation.

I can walk through the home with you, discuss its likely market position and help you understand what I would recommend if you decide to sell.

From there, we can create a plan around your family's timeline.

Sometimes that means listing relatively quickly.

Sometimes it means completing a few strategic projects first.

And sometimes the best decision is to wait.

The goal is to make the transition more manageable, not more overwhelming.

If your family is considering what to do with a parent's home in Westmoreland County or Western Pennsylvania, I'm happy to be a resource.

Kerry Sholtes
Realtor and Senior Transition Specialist 
Melissa Merriman Team, Always Home Group KW Steel City
724-858-8108    724-861-0500

Kerry@MelissaMerriman.com

Whether you're planning months ahead or dealing with an unexpected transition right now, we can start by figuring out what actually needs to happen next.